3.08.2009

the inner turmoil of a post adolescent girl

Ok - So, I've started to let myself worry about who reads what I write on here... and I suppose, chances are, no one does really. There are some people that I hope do. I love that some people that I don't know might read it - and wonder how they react to it. But, then there are the people that I know that might read it.
It's Sunday morning. I've been sick and in bed since Thurs night. Gives you a lot of time to think.
Sometimes I hate it when I have too much time to think.
I overwhelm myself!
Lately, my thought has been "What is the world am I doing with my life?"
No biggie, right.
I feel like this might be the time in my life when I start to think- I have dreams for my life...
To be a wife.
To be a mom.
Are those dreams enough? I know! It's so cliche - the inner turmoil of a post adolescent girl trying to figure out what she wants to do with her life.
I'm starting to realize how much of a kid I am not!
You would think at 21 I would have realized that a little while ago- but, no, now that I will on my own, legally own my own car, pay car insurance, will soon be legally an independent, therefor will be paying health insurance.
I have grown up bills, that require a grown up paycheck.
Sometimes, I think the grownups around me don't see that.
Ugh- see, writing, thinking, it's stressing me out.

3 comments:

  1. Adulthood certainly can be overrated at times...I still feel like I'm adjusting to the realities of it at times (and I am way beyond "post adolescence" as you well know) ;) ...Maybe to your surprise, maybe not, I can relate to what you are experiencing...I still wrestle with those questions and responsibilities...i'm here for ya!

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  2. I miss your postings Melissa. I'd love to know what you've been up to and how you're doing!

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  3. meliss- being a wife and mom is the most honorable occupation, ever. i feel the same, it is most definitely worthwhile, most definitely "dreams enough." love you.

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